What is Wargaming?
The esteemed Mr. Sharp or Big Board Gaming mentioned in Voices You Need To Hear youtube series, I think #8, but I just watched four of them and old man memory is bad. He (if I understood correctly) but forth idea that "wargames" are hex and counter. Which I agree with. They were the first type of wargame I played. I say "wargame" because I'm too lazy to say "Hex and Counter Wargame."
I do believe the mechanics, the style and interface of a game is the more important delimiter. Just because the subject of a game is "war", whatever that means, does not make it a war game. Card driven, area control, worker placement are going to influence me more than if the setting is Mars or Waterloo.
Of course, none of this matters. The point of the post is everyone's definition's are different. Do whatever you do and enjoy doing it!